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Archive for March, 2012

Alright y’all, I know I have been away for a bit, but I swear I have really good excuses reasons for my absence, I swear. I am not sure what just happened to my life, but everything went crazy suddenly. I don’t know wtf happened and why it all happened at once, but I must admit I am not unhappy. Let’s get down to the nitty-gritty, shall we.

Let me start by saying I have always said I work best in chaos with a full plate. I think my plate just went from nothing, to full, to over-flowing in like a weeks time. I kid you not, I am totally serious here folks! Just remember, my blog is called from life idle to life fantastic and I have talked about how I am working on major self-improvement and yada, yada, yada…

First step was getting back into school. I had to organize some things, but I got that accomplished and I start back April 3rd. Yes, I am totally stoked! I am a nerdy, I like to learn kinda gal. I have already downloaded my books to my Kindle and have my reading/writing assignments noted so I can work ahead this weekend. Okay, that last part is not as much nerd as it is necessity. Hold your horses folks and you will understand why.

Next step, health and wellness. Anyone remember reading my blogs about the Wheel of Life Tree? Part of my journey included health and wellness. Now, this may sound a little radical but I decided to do the Master Cleanse. It is an extensive cleanse that lasts 10-days as a minimum. I started this past Wednesday and will do a write up of the cleanse and my experience with it at the completion of the 10-days, which is approximately the 30th of March. I swear, I am not counting down the days!

Okay, so education, check; health and wellness, almost check; and I got to work out a few other Wheel of Life Tree things to check off as well! I am getting to those, no worries; they are biggies though! I would like to add the side note that I am working toward the home/physical environment part as well. I have cleared a few items out of my massive stash of clothes and hope to finish most of that this weekend.

Now, for the big ones! I found out Thursday that I am in training for a promotion! It will move me into a director position in my current division in our company. I must admit I am excited and nervous all at the same time! Currently, it means I have to do my current job as well as most of the director position functions; but I am unstoppable and confident, so I have no qualms about all that. It just means longer hours and more stress, but I can handle my fair share of that. It will also mean more money, so I have successfully increased my Wheel of Life Tree in the Career/Business/Work as pending the Money Finance areas.

I can say, without hesitation, that my life just jumped up into the fast lane. I have so many other areas of my Wheel of Life Tree that have really progressed as well, but I am running out of time to write. I just wanted to explain my absence a bit and let y’all know where I have been. I cannot I will be able to keep consistent on my blog, but I will come back to y’all soon ūüėČ

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No-cost

The best things in life are free. This is one of the largest myths told as far as I’m concerned. Now, before you start thinking this chic is a cynical crazy person, hear me out and have a little faith. I swear this is probably not what you think. Oh, come on, you know you’re intrigued so read on…
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English: Personal Charging case for electronic...

What is an e-cigarette and can they help me quit smoking? Are they safe for me? Those are the questions I am looking to answer. Having been a bit stressed lately, I have been smoking more than a pack of cigarettes per day. Once I realized what I was doing and how much I was spending, I realized something had to give. At that rate, quitting cold turkey is not an option. So, e-cigarettes, here I come. I have already made the switch, so I guess it is time to do my research.

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Compromise, sometimes that word raises some pretty interesting questions. Is compromise good? Is all compromise good compromise? How much compromise is too much compromise? Is one person compromising more than the other?

Compromise can be a very good thing, in small doses. Compromising isn’t always negative. You may compromise by stopping what you are doing to help another person. You may compromise by not smoking in the car with someone who has asthma or despises cigarette smoke. Neither of these compromises cost you anything or changes who you are at your core. The compromise you make for another should not compromise the soul.

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We have all know the quote “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you” from the bible, right? Basically, the theory is you treat others the way you want them to treat you in return. Why doesn’t this work more often? Think about this for a second. How many times have you treated someone really well and you did not get anything near that treatment in return?

So, what do you do? Do you start treating them how they are treating you because that is¬†apparently¬†how they want to be treated since they are treating you that way? Or, do you continue to treat them the way you want to be treated? It’s kind of like being stuck between a rock and a hard place when you think about it. If the other person just likes being treated poorly so they treat you poorly, will treating them good ever work? What if you are both trying to treat the other like you want to be treated? How frustrating because you both want to be treated differently than the other.¬†Maybe it isn’t working because there is a serious misunderstanding on treatment needs.

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I know I have talked about my Wheel of Life Tree and how I am using it to work on myself, so I figured I would talk a bit about the health and fitness part of my plan. I want to give a little back story, outline my goals, and use this as a platform to keep myself motivated. As long as I am blogging, I am probably better served if I am also getting motivation out of it as well ūüėČ

Okay, here it goes, the about me part. I have been a very unhealthy girl in the past who thought or did little with regards to changing my unhealthy ways. At one time, I weighed nearly 230 lbs, which was definitely not a good thing on my 5’5″ frame. I had had two children and blamed my weight on baby weight gain. I forget to add in the fried foods, fast foods, and other generally unhealthy stuff in my diet. I am not saying I didn’t eat fruits and veggies; however, there was no focus on nutrition what-so-ever. There was no focus on exercise either. Add to that cigarettes and occasional alcohol and, well, you get my point, I was in sad shape.

Luckily, I was in my 20’s and had time to implement change if only I could see change was necessary. I had no thought of change back then. Sure, I did all of the fad diets, but didn’t have the strength to stick to anything. I would always revert back to my old ways.

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I know I have been absent a bit; but this week and the following my boss is out-of-town, so I am covering his and my posts and life is about to get a little crazy. I should be back in full swing again in a few weeks. While I am about to compromise much of my time to cover his vacation, I thought I would research and write about compromise a bit. Compromise, whether in a professional or personal relationship, is key to making things work with another person.

What is compromise? Compromise is an act in which two people come to a mutual agreement to find common ground. Normally,  compromise means each side gives up or concedes some of their demands to make a mutual decision that should work best for both parties involved. However, according to Karen Salmansohn, not all compromise is good in a relationship.

Salmansohn shared a bad compromise is that which requires you change yourself in a way that makes you less yourself, but a good compromise requires you change in ways that help you grow into a better you. Good compromises are those that include things like asking the other person to attempt to be better organized and live more neatly, asking someone to take better care of his health, working toward fitness goals together, asking someone to communicate more directly or more clearly, and asking someone to talk less to actively listen more when there are communication issues. Good compromise doesn’t mean it is easy compromise, but that is compromise that will move both parties in a more positive direction or will positively impact the person you are asking to compromise. Compromise is not controlling the other person, but helping them be a better them.

She shared some interesting love advise derived from Aristotle. Aristotle looks at love and relationships in how a person chooses his mate. His claim is that many people are unhappy as their choice of mate is based on utility instead of finding a “relationship of shared virtue“.

What’s the difference you may ask? I know that was my big question. A utility chosen mate is one chosen for something like sex or money. In other words,¬†what you get from this person that is useful makes them a good choice. Whereas, “a relationship of shared virtue” is one where your mate understand what is at your core and is supportive of helping you reach your best you. Aristotle refers to the experience of dealing with a period of pain for change to occur with the knowledge that personal growth is at hand as “the education of the soul“. You only gain this from “a relationship of shared virtue”, which is why you surround yourself with people and an environment that supports you becoming the best you at your core. Basically, you are improving your soul and therefore your happiness with each positive change.

So what does all of this Aristotle philosophy of shared virtue and education of soul have to do with compromise anyway? Practicing good compromises, those made to help you become the best you possible, will seal the deal when it comes to strengthening the soul and becoming the best you. Have you ever been with someone who just made you want to be a better you or the best you possible? Shared virtue means that real love between two people that makes them want to be a better person because they are just inspired by one another. At least, that is my interpretation from what I read.

So, let’s get back to the compromise part of all this. How do you know exactly what is a good and what is a bad compromise? That is the tricky part. Sometimes a compromise seems okay at first and then you realize it was a manipulation instead of a compromise. Other times, you may think the compromise is a manipulation in disguise but later discover it was a good compromise when change for the better came of it.

On of the larger factors in distinguishing what type of compromise you are making is the consideration of self. Are you making a compromise that will actually compromise who you are and your core values, change your authenticity? I am not talking about requiring someone stop doing things that will hurt them, such as drugs or overeating; but of things that require you give up a piece of who you are or things you are passionate about. These are the obey me type of requests one person puts upon another and typically not requests made out of love and want for positive improvement. If the compromise is one of empowerment to the authenticity of the individual, inspirational, and one that motivates the person into becoming a better them, now we are talking about the good stuff.

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